Worst part of my signing tonight: No one was smiling. Some looked downright angry to be in B&N. Kinda sad.

— Eric Devine (@eric_devine) December 7, 2013

Best part of my signing tonight: 1. Raising $ for my school. 2. Seeing @NatanatorC, who hooked up her friends with copies of TAP OUT

— Eric Devine (@eric_devine) December 7, 2013

This past weekend I had a signing/Book Fair at the Barnes and Noble in Colonie. The Book fair is a fundraiser where a school receives proceeds from the purchases made during the time of the event. Students from Burnt Hills-Ballston Lake High School, my school, greeted customers, handed out candy canes, and wrapped gifts, all in an effort to boost sales, provide a nice experience for customers, and instill that holiday spirit. Only, there was one problem, as you’ll note from my “Best Part” “Worst Part” tweets above.

It was disheartening to be standing on the other side of the signing table, watching customer after customer, young, old and every age in between, walk past with a perma-scowl.

At first I thought it was just me being sensitive because I was signing and trying to help out my school, but I soon recognized that this wasn’t the case. 

As I do when signing, I inform people, who give the curious glance, just what I’m selling/signing. I also have my iPad set up with the trailer for Dare Me, in case people would rather watch than listen to me. Time and again, after I said, “Teen fiction”, frowns deepened. Some laughed wryly and said, “I need no more teen anything in my life,” as if adolescence is something to endure and be forever rid of.

Possibly for many, it is.

One woman said, “Being a teenager was tough enough for me, and tough enough raising my daughter through her teens years.” She couldn’t fathom how reading about teenagers would be a positive experience. My heart broke a bit with each of these exchanges.

Have no fear, many did stop and chat and watch the trailer, and ultimately had me sign. Some picked up both Dare Me and Tap Out. It was a positive event for sales, but I did not leaved pleased. Because it’s not solely about the sales.

I know how difficult this time of year is, and I know how difficult it is to be a teenager. I’ve struggled in many ways on both fronts, but the one thing I did all evening, and the one thing I’ve tried to do trough it all, is smile. And not some artificial, plastered on grin. I try to see the forest for the trees and accept that whatever is distressing me at the moment will pass. I try to appreciate the here and the now. Because I’ve learned too many times how that is all we are ever promised.

It is my wish for anyone who’s out there with the searing scowl, that you find something to brighten your day, to make you smile. And no, it doesn’t have to be shopping after working a long week and fighting for a spot in the parking lot. I understand that me behind a table with a stack of books may not bring a smile to your face. But I do hope for you that something does.

Because in my work, both in the classroom and in my books, I try to demonstrate the message that there is good in spite of the darkness. And if you’ve read my work, you know I spend a lot of time in that darkness. But there is light. There is hope. Even if there’s only a trace. There is something.

And in these dark winter months to come, I hope people turn to books for a source of hope. To teen fiction, to adult fiction, to children’s fiction, to all of the non-fiction. Anywhere that helps.

Because the holidays are too short to pass by in anger, as is life. So try it with me now. Just a little grin. Maybe one corner of your mouth. Now the other. Watch out, because here it comes, a full on smile. Now, hold it. remember how this feels.

Repeat as necessary 🙂